A Sunday Morning Kind of God......

A Sunday Morning Kind of God......

I'm usually not one to speak doom and gloom. Even as an ordained reverend, I don't spend a lot of my time advising people of the actions that might both negatively impact their time here on earth, and also might cause them consternation when they finally go to meet their maker. I much rather prefer to demonstrate, hopefully by my own walk, the life altering, spiritually fulfilling, benefits of truly surrendering your life to God and trying to live as God requires.

Yet, I am so vexed by things that are happening today as we watch those of various denominations, who profess to be followers of Christ, but whose public lives seems to completely neglect and ignore Christian principles and concepts.

I know that I will take a hit, probably several hits, for this blog post, but so be it. I prayed. I was led and well, here goes just like it happened with my book on church hurt.

I know that we all fall short and none of us is good; just as the Bible says. I have to ask for God's forgiveness repeatedly throughout the day. But there is a huge difference between "not being good," and intentionally and purposely committing acts that are unquestionably evil or that have the result of persecuting others.

I'm not naive. I have worked at various levels of local, state and federal government; even within the highest levels of the political arena, serving as press secretary for a successful, national presidential campaign. I'm aware that tough decision must be made on a daily basis, and that none of those decisions will be popular to all of the people at any time. But I am also aware that as individuals we must make tough decisions about what we will and what we won't do for a job, financial security, love or whatever else we deem important. As Christians we are called to measure our actions against our beliefs, and strive to demonstrate what those beliefs require our lives to look like.

There are 2.2 billion professed Christians in the world; Christianity is by far the worlds largest religion. Yet, I am constantly amazed when a profession of faith and belief, falls from the lips of individuals who visibly choose to abuse and belittle others, sew discord and contempt among  brethren, lie, cheat, and behave in a boastful and proud manner, and completely disregard the love that we are called to demonstrate. 

Even more discouraging is how the masses will follow, support and completely adore, individuals that walk this way, even though these actions come no where near honoring God or Biblical precepts. Not only will the masses support these individuals, but they also will continue to confess a love of God, and be fully committed to church attendance, service in the community and all of the outward demonstrations. It is as if there is a space on our fireplace mantel where we place God Monday through Saturday, only to pull him off the mantel for show on Sunday or on those occasions that we choose to act like what we say we are.

Indeed it is a process, one that we walk out our entire lives. No I am not perfect; there are things I have said and done, as recent as today, that I will forever regret and seek forgiveness for. But I also know that the taste of my fruit is becoming sweeter as I daily commune with God, attempt to serve as I am led to serve, and slowly learn to yield my will in favor of God's will for my life.

If you are struggling because the person that you see operating throughout the day looks nothing life what God has called us to be, I challenge you to carry this verse, or any one that speaks to you and can correctly order your steps, with you daily for reference.

God wants all of us; not just our Sunday mornings.

Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them." Ephesians 4:2: 

“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love." 1 Peter 4:8: 

“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins." John 15:12: “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you."

“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

If you're drowning, just RELAX! 

Every day we rise and set our minds on doing those things that we believe are necessary to our daily survival and our forward movement. Success, the world has told us, is achieved when we constantly position ourselves for BETTER; work hard, happily accept new responsibilities and challenges, meet and connect with as many people as possible, etc. Then we must support these hard work by maintaining and nourishing those connections and staying on the lookout for opportunity, even if it knocks at 5 a.m. or at midnight.

Some of the most celebrated ideas that tell us what to do to obtain success are:
-Work hard, and then work harder! 
-Success comes to those who are too busy to actually be looking for it! 
-The harder I work, the more luck I seem to have! 
-Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds! 
-There is simply no substitute for hard work when it comes to achieving a dream!
-If you have a dream, it is definitely achievable through hard work and sacrifice.!

Wow! I got tired just reading all of those.

Please don't get it twisted, I truly understand hard work. Nothing, and I mean Nothing has ever come my way by not producing or doing something. I serve as an instructor at three colleges and a university. I am a published author, ever aware of the pressure to produce that fourth book, that fifth book, and the one after that. I created and oversee a ministry that helps young adults navigate life by exploring who they are, why they were created and what amazing things they can accomplish. I also have a public relations company that I established in 2004, which is waiting to be re-launched,. I blog when I am discipline. I serve on an environmental board. I'm a public speaker and a workshop presenter.

I know that sounds familiar to a lot of you. Whew!

Somewhere though, between being all of that, plus a daughter, sister, friend, and pet-parent, I begin to answer my desire for an ever increasing level of spiritual focus, and a Holy spirit-led work ethic. I have begun to intentionally focus on thought patterns and habits that move me toward purpose fulfillment and that teach me when to move and how to move, and when to rest and be still.

Did you know that the worse thing you can do when you are drowning is to panic and flail about, trying to control what is happening? Experts tell us that our bodies will naturally float if we:

1. Yield
2. Relax
3. Put our bodies in an horizontal position
4. Look up to the sky and take a few deep breathes

Since our bodies are 72% water, it makes since that when we embrace who we are we not only survive, but we become more relaxed and at peace.

When you are overwhelmed, overworked and not seeing what you think should be coming to fruition in your life, just remember what to do when you are drowning. Don't panic. Be still. Place your body in a horizontal position and look up to the Creator. Take a few deep breaths, relax and allow God to lead you through a natural correction of your life's course.

Personal initiative is not and will never be a substitute for trust and reliance upon God. There is both power and security in God, and as we learn to "let down, cease or slacken" our efforts to fight in our own strength, we can acknowledge the power and security that our connection to God rewards us with. Life may let us down, but God won't let us drown.

Psalm 46:10 - "Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations. I will be exalted in the earth."

 Learning How to be Still ......

When I was a child growing up in a church-going family, I remember being in church several times each week, and that's probably an understatement. The church was truly the place where our extended family lived; and that relationship, for the most part, was held in high esteem and nurtured.

Like most families with children though, being in church all of the time could be challenging for the parents; but even more so for us as children. We had the attention span of a child in church - probably because that is what we were, and that just didn't seem to work out well for us. Countless times after our "endurance" wore off, our mother would pat us gently on the leg, and tell us to be quiet. The second time she would look toward us and smile, and again admonish us to "be quiet." When patience really wore thin and we were causing too many distractions or making too much noise, she would look us in the eye, make a stern face, and say "be still," meaning don't move a muscle, don't talk, eyes straight ahead.

I hadn't even thought of those times until I found myself in a place to be reminded. Several very close confidantes (and my mother, of course) have been admonishing me to Be Still lately. The Holy Spirit also has been giving me that message. But, that's tough for me because while I know the scripture, "Be still and know that I am God (Psalm 46:10), I evidently kept proving to myself and others that I have no clue how to live it out completely.

You see like a lot of us, I have also felt better about myself and my life when I am going in hard - being ambitious, using a lot of energy and challenging myself to complete and do well at something. During most of my career, I have been achievement and results driven; sometimes measuring success based on whether I got the contract, earned the promotion, won the contest, or earned an "A." I didn't see a problem with this because of course, that's how the world measures personal value, right?

Well, if I've learned nothing else since choosing to fully pursue my God-Ordained purpose, I have learned not to EVER use worldly activities as a measuring stick. God's ways definitely are not "our" ways.

During my path to purpose it became necessary for me to have much more of God - more wisdom, more Holy Spirit guidance, more knowledge - and to gain that, I had to have much less of "that" part of Nina. To live on purpose, I had to purposely live for God. That meant less focus on measuring my success in terms of what I could count and see, and more focus on measuring my success on how obedient I was to God and how much better I was at "watching and seeing" God's activities in my life. It also required me to build and strengthen my relationship with God through prayer, meditation, and Bible Study, while practicing "hearing from God" to gain guidance and direction beyond the general scriptures in the Bible.

Things like competitiveness, stress, worry, measuring our success through our own definitions and being overly controlling of life circumstances, can cause us years of pain and hurt because we are still relying on our own limited ability and not God's unlimited capabilities. Trust me I know this because I had to walk it out; and I am still being delivered from things that are of the flesh and not of the Holy Spirit.

I share this for all of you who truly want to discover who you are, why you exist and what you can accomplish. Take some time right now to learn to lean on God, and most importantly to BE STILL AND KNOW THAT HE IS GOD. 

Countless scriptures remind us of the benefit of that. Here are just a few of my favorites to  guide you....

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will act - Psalms 37:5

Be still and know that I am God............. - Psalm 46:10

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean to your own understanding - Proverbs 3:5

The heart of a man plans his way, but the Lord established his steps - Proverbs 16:9

Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing - John 15:4-5



Published Writer - Church Hurt Ain't No Joke (book and workbook), Where Have All the Young Ones Gone: Connecting and Reconnecting Young Adults to God and the church; Why Yes to God: Essays on Life and God by Young Adults

To purchase or to order discounted bulk or signed copies, please contact: 
Rev. Dr. Nina Marie Thompson at NICHEPR2018@GMAIL.COM. You may also order copies of all three books at Amazon.com.

Speaker - Positioning for Purpose, Getting to God, Why Yes to God?   

Workshop Presenter - Church Hurt Ain't No Joke, Say What You Mean, Why Do I Get Soo Mad?, Recognize Your Power, Plan Your Future, From Hurt to Healing



Rev. Dr. Nina M Thompson, 
Rose of Sharon Ministries, Inc.
314-550-2004 (for prayer)
https://www.facebook.com/roseofsharonytg/
roseofsharonnow@gmail.com

Bandages or Surgery?

            Life seems more out of wack than ever before, especially for those 15 to 29.  They seem to be involved in more serious crimes, taking larger numbers of their own lives or the lives of others, or stumbling through life making one mistake after another. We, collectively, are doing something wrong.

          Now, there are millions of success stories; stories of those within this age group focused on resolving their own special challenges, and even challenges within the larger society. These often go unmentioned and unshared. . But there are many others who desperately need strategies to help them put the spark back into their eyes, their lives, their futures. 

          As a college Oral Communications and English instructor and a young adult minister, I witness the daily frustration, self-loathing, and the loss for what to do. I spend a lot of time praying with them, helping them find solutions that work, and affirming their self worth. 

          But way too often we simply puts "bandages" in place, throwing dollars into solutions like job training, education and employment, and then throwing hands up in frustration when our target population does not "do what's right."  

           The truth is that in most cases, the failure is not theirs to bear; at least not alone. It is collectively ours because sometimes bandages don't heal sores. Sometimes they create even worse wounds that fester and create places and spaces in the body and mind that become raw, aching and excruciatingly painful.

        As children, if our scrapes or wounds became infected, our parents immediately applied additional ointments, let the wound "air out" or called a doctor to see how they could "take the infection out." Trusting only in the usefulness of bandages could have caused us to end up with scaring. 

          If the usefulness of bandages for bodily sores is limited, what makes us think the usefulness of them as a strategy to address huge, gaping emotional scars isn't limited? 

          Sometimes we have to perform surgery to address issues caused by outside forces, to relieve pain, to reduce the symptoms of an ongoing problem or to improve how our body functions. We have to employ reparative strategies that affirm the value of life, and prepare our young people to take full advantage of those traditional solutions. We must invest in programs that allow young people to discover who they are, why they exist and what they were meant to accomplish. Let's empower them to build emotional stamina and spiritual fortitude, improve interpersonal relationships and develop as leaders who are healthy, purpose-focused and who positively impact theirs and others lives. 

          Let's snatch off those bandages, and bear the pain. Surgery, while it might be more painful, often can bring a complete and total healing, not merely a cover up for a festering sore.

               

    






-http://www.bemagazine.org/changemakers-directory/43935/rose-of-sharon-ministries-inc/
-https://www.facebook.com/roseofsharonytg/
-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7A4aOhpCU5Q

So...what's the deal with "church hurt"?

       In October 2011, I published a book and workbook titled, Church Hurt Ain't No Joke. The book  examined the causes and impact of being emotionally and spiritually hurt while attending church, and offered solutions for understanding it and growing from it. In its totality, the book takes the reader through a definition of "church hurt," describes how and why it occurs, suggests how pastors and church leadership can avoid and work through it, and how individuals can both survive and thrive as they victoriously walk through it.

       Little did I know that six years later some church leaders would still be responding to the phrase "church hurt" as if it unfairly chastises the church and hurts its reputation. What is interesting though is that the ones who consistently claim the inappropriateness of the term, are probably the same ones that have not objectively read my book or any other book about the phenomenon from cover to cover, spoken with church members, besides their own, to see what they think about the topic, held conversations with those who have chosen not to attend church, or worked to acquire any new perspective or clear understanding of why the term has become so popular and endearing to multitudes of individuals.

       One of the primary comments often echoed against the phrase is that other types of common hurt are not coined in the same way. For example, opponents of the term contend that since we don't say, "school hurt," "family hurt" or "beauty shop hurt," it is inappropriate to "target" what happens in church as "church hurt." My answer to that has consistently been that in NONE of those venues do we walk in as spiritually open and vulnerable, expecting and searching for unconditional love and acceptance.

       Another primary grievance registered against the phrase is that "churches don't hurt people, people hurt people." Technically that is true, but isn't it also true that the church is "responsible" to set the tone and agenda for its members? Or, at the very least, as church leaders we have a responsibility to hold up a standard that says "church hurt" will not be normalized. Church leaders also should be accountable to embrace a strategy that equips leadership and members to walk through it focused on spiritual maturity and growth.

       Maybe if we as church leaders could contain our personal sensitivities and keep our God-ordained purposes in mind, we could reconnect with the ever increasing numbers of individuals who daily decide to leave the church. If we could focus on raising up leaders and disciples, maybe the "church hurt" phenomenon could serve as the panacea that guides us toward building church strategies that address the residual pain and separation from church that this type of hurt can lead to.

        Ignoring the impact of "church hurt" is detrimental to our universal goals. It does little to position us to serve those with whom we are charged to serve, guide and mature in preparation for them to fulfill their created purpose.  More importantly, it takes away from the very important tasks of raising spiritually healthy and mature individuals, who are equipped to more fully surrender to God's will.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/0615517587/ref=cm_sw_su_dp
https://www.amazon.com/dp/0991028716/ref=cm_sw_su_dp

http://www.stlamerican.com/entertainment/living_it/healing-from-church-hurt/article_26eba8c0-51ec-11e5-acef-4f1c0aa01852.html